Sunday, September 5, 2010

The Ferocious Fives

In my so called" organized chaos" last week with getting the kids ready the start of school, getting the house organized and appearing over at Scary Mommy as a Featured Guest Blogger (Check it out here), I forgot all about my post over at Mama Buzz to which I'm a contributor. And it is on a subject to which I had some experienced some challenge today! UGH! 

The Ferocious Fives.

“George”, I yelled. “Will you please get dressed?”
And then it started.
My simple request for my son to get dressed had sparked a full on break down. In five year old fashion, he dropped to the ground and dramatically started screaming and crying. He wasn’t done with his game he demanded, he wanted 5 more minutes. This on top of the 5 minutes I gave him 15 minutes ago.
This hasn’t become an uncommon response. Simple requests to start cleaning up, get dressed, and to listen, often result in him trying to assert his independence by refusing to do so, breaking down or just pretending he doesn’t hear me at all. I’m not sure if it is the unpredictability of hot summer days or the lack of structure, but my little boy who always listened and said please and thank you, had become a do what he wants when he wants, back talking five year old.
Want to read more? Click here.
Then hop on back and let me know what was your child's most challenging age so far and how you got through it.

1 comment:

  1. I left a comment on Mama Buzz, too. Here are my "two cents": (1) Consistency is the key. You really have to say what you mean and mean what you say to keep the upper hand. If you say five more minutes, then set the timer (a little egg timer right there where he's playing will alert both of you) and make him stick to it. As a mom with other kids in the house, it's very easy to get distracted with other tasks and forget all about it; then we feel like the child has "gotten over" on us which makes us feel angrier about the situation. (2) Let the punishment fit the crime: don't threaten to sell the game system back to the store if you're not really going to do that. My sister once told my nephew he "wasn't going to have a birthday party" if he kept talking back. Guess what? He kept talking back and still had his b-day at one of those indoor inflatables places. She wasn't going to cancel the party, lose her deposit, and uninvite all of the kids, so she never should have "threatened" that. As mothers we get so busy multi-tasking that we often shoot ourselves in our own feet when it comes to discipline. Maybe tell George "You'll lose your video game privileges all day tomorrow if you will not listen to Mommy." That seems reasonable. The consistency (and difficult part) comes with not caving when he's acting like the perfect angel for the rest of the day after he's lost his privileges. He still shouldn't get his video game until the day after next. Once the "punishment" is sentenced it should not be changed or reduced. Of course, you could always add to it, "If you continue to argue about this, you'll lose 2 days..." I hope this isn't too harsh. I just wish I'd been a little more consistent with my kids earlier on and maybe they'd be better listeners today.


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